Photos here.
A truly brilliant experience. A big thanks goes out to Mattias for organising the tour and Bill for providing driving and reality check. We have new friends in Flyktplan who played a blinding set of hardcore punk rock every night. We also have developed our own "how to swear a bit in Swedish" dictionary. Here is the breakdown (no pun intended, you'll get it later)
Weds 6 Sept - Southampton. King Alfred with Social Parasites. A good start and a nice crowd for a mid week gig.
Thurs 7 Sept - Bristol. The Junction. Before we left Southampton we had to change a tyre on the van. We checked the oil. There wasn't enough to even touch the dipstick..Oh dear. After sorting that, we got there early, starting on the cloudy cider. Fuk played and Richie kindly gave us somewhere to crash. Only problem was, we couldn't get the van started. [Breakdown 1] After a failed bump start down hill and a push back up the hill, Saul Haywire appeared with a battery and jump leads and we were motoring.
Fri 8 Sept - the journey.
In the morning we feed up on vegan Jamaican patties that Jamie and Linus picked up on their way back from the skate park. The van starts fine. We loaded the gear up at the pub and then...it won't start. [Breakdown 2] Out come the spanners and Jamie starts walloping the starter motor. Not for the first time...So we are motoring up the M5, getting a few miles in and charging up the battery , we hope. So we stop at services to have a wash, grab a coffee and fuel up. Only the van won't start. [Breakdown 3] So we investigate further. No electrolyte in the battery. We top that up but no matter how hard we hit the starter motor, it ain't going nowhere. We push the van across 2 lanes of traffic to the lorry park for an uphill bump start. Which doesn't work. So we turn it round and manage a downhill bump start just fine. Feeling very happy with ourselves we head up the M42. Half an hour later, we lose all power. [Breakdown 4]. Time to call the AA. They arrange a van and a truck to take us and the van to the nearest services where the AA start diagnosing the problem. We nip into the shop and sort ourselves out a picnic. A few beers appear from the van and the sun is shining. Maybe this breaking down ain't so bad.....After England beats Sweden at the "What do you know about our country?" trivia game, the AA inform us we need a new alternator. £150 later the van runs fine. We stop to get the tour photo in front of a steam roller, wishing we had used that as it would have been quicker. Although we have lost a lot of time we will just about make it to the venue in Leeds on time and the promoter knows we are running late. Now we're motoring. Up the M1 we go before we hit gridlock traffic cos Robbie Fucking Williams is playing a gig! We area bit concerned because we would rather not find out the lights aren't working when it is dark! This is not the last of our worries. Someone notices that passing cars are pointing at us. And it's not just "Look at that bunch of punks", they are all pointing at the driver's side front wheel. Time to pull over again. Nearest services 1 mile and we find out we have a flat tyre. [Breakdown 5]. Luckily we brought a full tool kit including a 5 foot scaffold pole with us. It takes 2 of us on the end of the pole to loosen the wheel nuts - and we bend the T-bar in the process. The jack is shit and takes forever but a passing RAC van lends us a jack. On goes the iffy tyre. The RAC bloke also gives us a jump start., saving the starter motor from some serious grief. 8 hours after leaving Bristol we finally arrive in Leeds. We offload the van and prepare to bump start it to get to where we are eating, but it starts fine. Weird....Being no-one's fools we make sure we park it at the top of a hill facing down for the morning.
Fri 8 Sept - Leeds. The Fenton. After food from Dingo and John's place, we arrive just in time to buy a pint and play. Life has all just become a big blur. War All The Time follow us and knock out a seriously good dose of thrash. Flyktplan top off the night and it's back for a party. We are all very tired.
Sat 9 Sept - Boston. Indian Queen. Before breakfast, Jamie & Linus are off skating again. Then it's off for vegan bacon and sausage subs. Hmmm...... Back to the van we start it up, pick up the gear from the venue (with the engine running) and head to a Transit breakers to pick up a ropey tyre with a nail in it. Better than no tyre. We decide to keep it for a spare. Just in case.....The Transit breaker gives us a jump start and it's next stop Boston. We park up in a car park with a nice long run up and head for the off licence. At about 6 we meet the promoter and after 2 attempts the van is up and running and we go on a tour of the Fens for dinner. A grateful plate of nosh and a few beers then it's another bump start. Arriving back in Boston we offload the gear and park the van strategically so we can get a good long run along the very flat lands of Lincolnshire. The gig goes off like a chimp's tea party at which someone put Special Brew in the teapot. A human pyramid gets formed and the crowd tries carrying Alan off while we play, before a human bowling ball knocks Jamie and Nath flying. Memory fails me but there were 3 other bands playing including War All The Time. Flyktplan turn out another set to be proud of which leaves us in high spirits. Which is just as well.....Upon reaching the van, we find we have another flat fecking tyre. At the back this time. [Breakdown 6]. Not trusting our dodgy spare, we bump start the van with a flat tyre and send off 3 people to put air in it. Meanwhile we form a stockpile of equipment in the market square. Finally we arrive at our sleeping destination complete with showering facilities. Woohoo! And the tyre still seems inflated.
Sun 10 Sept. Brighton. Engine Rooms. A misty morning on the Fens reveals the sight of...a flat tyre. The bastard has gone down. We say goodbye to our host after playing with his crazy dog. As much banging of the starter motor as we can manage and the van still won't start. So it's another flat tyre bump start. We are getting good at these bump starts, and the van starts within 15 feet. Nearest garage for air and fuel, and a junk food breakfast. Another stop, another bump start. Then we motor all the way to Brighton. 2 piss stops but we leave the engine running. By this time, sanity levels have reached a new low. We are talking complete gibberish and wearing studded belts and straps around our heads. A curry round at Bill's place, a tour poo incident, then we offload the gear into a reliable van to take us to the venue. Slaughterhouse 57 kick off the gig followed by Fall of Effafra. At some point the bass speaker gets blown. On the last night. What a bummer. But both touring bands put in a good account of themselves before we head back to Bill's for more booze. This is the end. But not for Whole In The Head, who have to get the shit van back home in the morning, fix the tyres and starter motor and a bass speaker. But it was worth it. We wouldn't have missed it for the world.